Saturday, August 7, 2021

Lovies: The Best Security Blanket


Did you have a "lovie" as a child?  I introduced these to my children at a very early age as a technique to help them sleep through the night.  Little did I know that they would become such an important part of the family.

Why do humans need security objects?  Because they provide items that are used to help self-soothe.  I learned about this tool when I was a new parent, and I wanted to help my children develop better sleep habits.  I was following the Ferber method* and I think it was very helpful in those early years.  I selected beanie babies for my children, because they were a perfect size and soft, but durable.  Unfortunately, I didn't realize that these little animals are limited production and actually would become collectables at some point!  

Everyone needs something that is special to them and a friend that is always there.  As a baby, the lovey was a companion that was there when you wake up alone in the crib at night.  During grade school, the lovey is a friend who has been through a lot of experiences with you and who is always there.  

Lovies are special.. Because you love them for so long, they develop a special "feel" and scent that is very special to you and only you.  Even as you age, sometimes you can go back to your lovey for that special connection when you need them.  I remember on night, I went in to check on my son one evening during middle school, and the lovey that had been shelved from grade school had made its way next to his pillow for the night. 

Should you worry about your kids taking their lovies to college?  No.  Although my teenager still sleeps with her bunny lovey, but its her special secret that she doesn't share with any of her friends.  The whole point is that the relationship and connection is special.  Its an important tool to evoke a sense of safety and pleasant childhood memories.  

There has definitely been a few times when we misplaced or lost a lovey.  Those times can be devastating.  Early on I purchased an extra "lovey" to have as a backup just in case.  I have had more than one airport panics looking for a lost lovey in a bathroom or lounge.  When my son was still in grade school, and very attached to his beanie baby, I showed him a video of a boy who was reunited with his lovey after three years.  Unfortunately the video has been removed, but it was one of the first times I saw my son show empathy for someone else. As he watched the video, he actually cried because he understood what it felt like to lose (and re-find) your special friend.

Did you have a lovie as a child?  Do you still own it as an adult?  Please share your memories below.

Daily Writing Response 10/300

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